SHAMELESS SMUT YAY
by Correcthorsebatterystaple
Summary: Phantom wasn't expecting to be caught in the act of snooping around in Freud's room, but what he was expecting even less was to catch Freud in an act of his own. PWP, PhanFreud oneshot.


_Keep your hands to yourself. Afrien hates thieves._

These words did not deter a certain phantom thief from sneaking about said dragon master's room and prying through his things. If anything, they only _encouraged_ him. Only Phantom could be spurred on to doing exactly what he shouldn't be by the thought of a mage's soulbonded dragon charbroiling him and eating his sticky fingers for dinner. Only Phantom.

Freud's room was always pristine, the wood clear of dust and looking finely polished, smelling faintly of lemons. The bed was made, and the papers and pen he kept on his bedside table, in case of an emergency need to write, were stacked neatly. Sometimes it made Phantom wonder if the man secretly abused his magical powers as a cleaning tool. _Surely_, Freud _must_ have _some_ sort of dirty little secret. But the well-kept room hardly gave Phantom anything to work with!

Phantom flopped on the bed and gave a childish huff, nosing into the sheets.

Hm. They smelled like Freud. His violet eyes slipped shut for a moment and the huff turned into a sigh, before it occurred to him that sniffing his best friend's bed was probably a line he shouldn't cross, because he was already being creepy enough by trespassing in the redhead's room.

(It wasn't Phantom's fault, though, that Freud just _had _to smell like worn parchment, ink and a trace of cinnamon crossed with caramel. It wasn't _Phantom's _fault that Freud's scent was like some delectable treat.)

Phantom lifted his head up as it occurred to him that maybe the scholar had something hidden under his pillow. He lifted it up, and...

Nothing.

"_Freu~d!" _Phantom whined aloud. "Where do you keep all the blackmail material?"

And just then, Phantom heard footsteps going up the stairs.

_Shit._

The thief's eyes expertly darted around the room, looking for a hiding place. Under the bed was too noticable. Going out through the window would leave the window conspicuously open. But... _Aha_! Phantom darted into the closet, leaving the door open the slightest crack. He peered through said crack as he heard the door to the bedroom open.

Freud didn't look suspicious at all, he simply walked over to the bed and laid down on it, relaxing. Phantom tensed up as the man glanced towards the closet for a split second, before looking away.

The thief could hear several soft cracks as Freud rolled his shoulders and sighed, yawning softly to briefly expose white teeth and a pink tongue.

And then Freud was sliding his clothes off, shiny red fabric running across creamy white skin before being discarded in a heap on the floor that Phantom was sure would be picked up and folded neatly at a later time. The thief's breath hitched slightly as more and more of his friend's body was exposed.

_Was he...?_

Then Freud was laying back, completely uncovered, and repeating in Phantom's mind was a chorus of _oh Goddess, oh Goddess, oh Goddess, _as he struggled not to let his eyes drift lower.

The blond failed.

Freud's body was slender and soft-looking, _bitable. _Phantom took in every nuance, every dip and every scar, and found himself admiring every little thing, from his long and slender fingers, fingers fit for a writer or a pianist, to the shadows set under his kneecaps, to the trail of red-brown hair trailing down from his navel, to...

Phantom's brain short-circuited. And as the scholar's hands trailed over his body, he wasn't sure whether to want Freud to stop or think _don't you dare. _He found himself uncomfortably aroused.

The thief's hand came up over his mouth, stifling his shaky breathing when Freud's hand wrapped around his member. This was far past plain out creepy, wasn't it? Still, it wasn't as if Phantom _meant _to be awkwardly caught watching his best friend please himself... This was all Freud's fault.

Freud's head fell back against the pillow, red, brown and gold strands mixing together in a halo against the white and gold case to remind Phantom of autumn leaves. The man's chest rose and fell, lost in sensation as he stroked himself.

Phantom's face burned in a furious blush.

"Phantom..." It was a cross between a laugh and a moan, coming from Freud's parted lips, and it made Phantom's stomach flip-flop. It startled the blond, causing him to jerk his head back against the wall painfully.

"You can come out now."

Well, _shit._

Phantom stumbled out of the closet with a flurry of excused coming from his lips. "Freud, I didn't- It wasn't like-" He began, mortified and praying that he hadn't just ruined their friendship.

Freud raised a hand to silence Phantom, an obliging smile playing across his lips. "I know," He said simply.

"I'll just... Go," Phantom murmured sheepishly, taking a step.

"Mm," Freud hummed pleasantly. "Nope."

"What-?" All of a sudden, Phantom was being dragged down to the bed and straddled by a very much naked Freud. His head spun with heated arousal, making his limbs feel weak. Freud was a presence all around him, wrapping him up in warmth. His hands were on either side of Phantom's head. And perhaps worst of all (_best,_ a corner of him whispered) was that he could feel the dragon master's erection pressing into his hip.

Phantom's adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed hard. He looked up at Freud, and the hero's face was that of the cat whom had gotten the cream.

"_Freud,"_ Phantom protested weakly. But his protests died on his lips as Freud bent his head to lave his throat with his tongue. The warm wetness against his sensitive neck felt so good, leaving his fingers curling into the sheets haplessly, hopelessly, helplessly. His body begged for more of Freud's touch, showing it by leaning his head back to allow the other man more access.

The redhead's fingers were everywhere at once- one second, in his curly blond hair, tugging and petting, and the next stroking his thighs, coaxing them a little further apart.

Freud made quick work of Phantom's clothes, unclasping the cloak, unbuttoning the military-style shirt and sliding his pants and boots off. The cool air hit Phantom's freed erection, which throbbed as Freud's hands roamed his body.

Phantom was a beautiful wreck, then, and Freud had barely even touched him. His lips trembled, begging for contact, and the other man didn't hesitate in giving it to him. Their lips met in a kiss that made a wonderful feeling bubble in the blond's chest, dizzy and hot and borderline painful, like the edge of an orgasm. Before long their tongues were sliding together wetly, licking up teeth and gums and everything in between, _tasting each other._ Phantom could feel every flutter of Freud's lashes against his cheeks.

Phantom sighed in disappointment, eyes half-lidded, when Freud pulled back and sat up to rummage through a drawer in his bedside table. What he pulled out was a bottle full of strawberry and lavender scented oil, which, for the mean time, he set aside. And then he was grasping at Phantom's back, fingers running down the dip that was his spine in his arching back before coming to cup the globes of his ass.

Freud's fingers found the thief's erect member and stroked down through pale golden curls, eliciting a soft and sweet sound from the blond.

"Mmh..."

Freud squirted a liberal amount of oil onto his hand, slicking his fingers, and pressed one into Phantom's entrance. The thief made a face; the intrusion was uncomfortable.

Two more fingers were soon enough being pushed in and out of Phantom, and it didn't take long to begin to feel good. And before long, Freud had found just the right place to curl his finger, making Phantom thrash his head and curl his toes, breathy gasps falling from his lips like rain from clouds. The blond found himself rutting back against Freud's fingers.

There was something so wonderfully arousing about being at Freud's mercy. Being spread out for him, feet in the air and his knee hugged to his chest.

Freud finally pulled his slick fingers out, to Phantom's disappointment, before slicking his length with oil. He lined himself up with Phantom.

"Ready?" Freud's voice was deepened with arousal.

In response, Phantom pressed his ass closer needily. Freud grinned and pressed in.

It was uncomfortable at first, as expected. More so than the first finger had been. But a minute or two passed and it felt amazing, to have Freud so close to him. There was the physicality of it, of course- Phantom's mind was practically fogged over with pleasure and desire. But... There was also the fact that he was trusting himself to Freud.

The room filled with the sound of panting, the slap of skin on skin, and the faint creaking of the bed. Both of the men were lost in pleasure, lost in each other.

Phantom wondered at how just an hour ago, he had been innocently looking through Freud's room to try and find some dirty little secret.

Each thrust was too much and not enough. Everything was building higher and higher and despite feeling like a hormonal teenager because of it, Phantom knew he wasn't going to last long. Their lips met once again, their second ever kiss, and Freud was groaning softly into the blond's mouth.

Freud's thrusts sped up, each time hitting the spot that made Phantom see white, and the thief was reaching for the other man, tangling his fingers in his hair just for _something_ to hold onto.

And as it all came crashing over Phantom, far too soon and not soon enough, he was breathing out obscene noises and whispering "_Freud, I love you."_

It was almost unsettling how wide Freud smiled as he collapsed on top of the thief after orgasm. The scholar usually wore a serene expression and nothing else.

Phantom flushed as he realized what he had said, and buried his face in the pillow.

"You're finally admitting it?"

"Nope," Phantom groaned in embarrassment, shoving a hand in Freud's face. "You heard nothing."

Freud chuckled and wrapped Phantom up in his arms. Perhaps having his best friend- and now lover- randomly jump his bones wasn't so bad.

"I love you too."

* * *

**AN: -SOBS BECAUSE I COULDN'T WAIT FOR FUCKABLE FREUD FRIDAY-**

**-SOBS BECAUSE I'M RUSTY AT WRITING SMUT AND THIS KIND OF SUCKS-**


End file.
